The nice thing about casting Lindsay Lohan and Emma Stone as the same character, with real time non-falsies, in your WOODPECKER WITH STILL WIFE rip-off, is that you just know that she is going to show up late, or maybe even be on time and is just too exhausted, whatever, because she was out all night just two hours earlier.
So now, according to Hollywood union regs, you get to have your mid-morning exploitation coffee break in your trailer. Where there is nothing in the world like a nice and tight early boner blow job wake-up call by some gorgeous starlet with big tits and no makeup who you can legally fire on the spot. If you feel like reporting her spoiled brat tardy sex habits. Knowing full well that all you are contractually obligated to do is shoot a few quickie pick up shots of her, and worry about it later in post, or not.
Either way, your ass is covered. Even if LL decides to haul your ass into court. Because all you have to do is show the judge the latest TMZ video of her stumbling out of some LA nightclub, like 45 minutes before call time, and you still get to use her in your production trailer, and in the movie trailer. Which will feature her really sexy scenes that are not going to be in the movie anyway.
Talk about having your chocolate cake and eating it too.
Whoever thought that the day would come when Paris Hilton replaces Lindsay Lohan in some PLAN B-movie horror film at the new and improved SUNDANCE festival in Utah for mega media communication corporations due to budget considerations?
Oh yeah, "I want you in my next picture."
You make me look like a sucker. I'll make you look like a sucker.
GSR/TWN
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